الامام علی علیه السلام: ذَلِّلوا أخلاقَكُم بِالمَحاسِنِ، و قَوِّدوها إلَى المَكارِمِ ، و عَوِّدوا أنفُسَكُمُ الحِلمَ

Imam Ali (as): Subdue your character with virtues, lead it towards goodness, and make your soul accustomed to patience.(Tuhaf al-’Uqül, p.224.)
Exposition:
tadhlīl means subduing. Naturally, there are conflicts and incompatibilities in human’s character. He has to dissolve them, leading his character towards an equilibrium. For instance, he must lead his valiance towards courage and bravery, not letting it to turn into audacity. This must be done by identifying one’s traits as well as planning and practicing. Transient and impermanent decisions are ineffective and fruitless.
There is, however, a factor that may ignite a surprising revolution inside a person, and that is the elixir of loving God. If one’s heart turns towards God Almighty, he will cover the path of a hundred years journey in one night.
Next, Imam orders us to accustom our souls to patience.
Patience does not just mean ‘not getting angry’. Rather, it means expanding one’s capacity. One must be like a sea wherein roaring waves of rivers calm down. He must be so when faced with factors leading to his anger, pride, or meaningless delight.

There are all features of good character through which we can attract people towards goodnese as the Prophet (S) says: Verily, you can never benefr [all] people with your properties; so, benefit them with your [good] character.
This means that you do not have the means to keep all people in the sphere of your affection and relation . You cannot do this with your properties, but you enjoy an instrument with which you may attract the hearts of all people or most of them. What is that? It is [good] character.
If you are humble, truthful, if do not destroy this one or that one, if you keep your words – these are all characteristics that people like – then you may attract people’s hearts with these good traits and praiseworthy characteristics.

Book: Hadith Of Life, Published by: Tahseen

رسول الله صلی الله علیه وآله وسلّم :من اکل ما یشتهی ولبس ما یشتهی ورکب مایشتهی لم ینظر اللّه الیه حتی ینزع او یترک

The Prophet Muhammad (S): Whosoever eats whatever he desires, wears any clothes he wishes, and mounts any roadster he wnats, God will not look at him until he takes off , and gives up . (Tuhaf al-Uqul, p.38)

Exposition:

In the phrase “…mounts any roadster he wishes", the real meaning of the words may be meant; that is choosing any roadster he is willing to mount. It is also possible that the phrase refers to “whatever he likes to do".

Anyway, the person will be deprived of Allah’s nercy _as the source of all goodness and any perfection_ by doing such things. The only solution is to give up, through a voluntary asceticism, whatever he wishes and can attain.

Those who have no power to fulfill all their desires must be happy, for it is a great blessing not to be able to fulfill all one’s passions and desires. However, if one is able and refrains, he will get a greater reward.

Book: Hadith Of Life, Published by: Tahseen.

الامام السجاد علیه السلام: ابْنَ آدَمَ إِنَّكَ لاَ تَزَالُ بِخَيْرٍ مَا دَامَ لَكَ وَاعِظٌ مِنْ نَفْسِكَ وَ مَا كَانَتِ اَلْمُحَاسَبَةُ مِنْ هَمِّكَ وَ مَا كَانَ اَلْخَوْفُ لَكَ شِعَارا وَ الْحَذَرُ دِثَارا

Imam al-Sajjad(as): O son of Adam! You will be in the right path as you have an advisor inside yourself, as long as you pay attention to self-examination, and as long as fear is your underwear and abstinece is your clothing. (Tuhaf al’Uqul, p.280)

Exposition:

Although no one is free from the need to be advised by others, the advice originating from one’s innermost is the best advise. This is because everyone is aware of his own characteristics and faults more than anyone else.

One’s attempts must be focused on self-examination. If other do not assess us, we must not give up assessing ourselves. Self-examination prevents us from future fautls.

“Fear” in this hadith means fearing God and His punishment as well as one’s own wrongdoing, not fearing people and flimsy powers.

Abstinence refers to discretion; it does not mean that one must be inactive; rather one must enter various fields of activity, but he must observe discretion and abstinence. This is the real meaning of piety.

Book: Hadith of Life, Published by: Tahseen.

الامام السجاد علیه السلام: مَا مِنْ شَيْ‏ءٍ أَحَبَّ إِلَى اللَّهِ بَعْدَ مَعْرِفَتِهِ مِنْ عِفَّةِ بَطْنٍ وَ فَرْجٍ وَ مَا مِنْ شَيْ‏ءٍ أَحَبَّ إِلَى اللَّهِ مِنْ أَنْ يُسْأَل.

Imam al-Sajjad (as): Nothing, after knowing God, is more favorite foe Him than chastity and eating religiously legitimate things; and nothing is more favorite for Him than requesting Him. (Tahf al-Uqul, p.282)

Exposition:
The reason why Imam proclaims the most favorite things for God, after knowing Him, to be chastity and eating religiously legitimate things, and does not metion other obligatory practices such as daily prayers, is that chastity is a preventive factor that hinders the disturbing factors, and the effect of facilitating factors. It is just like when someone uses nourishing and useful foods and at the same time takes in posionous materials; certainly, those foods would have no positive effect.

Similarly in spiritual matters, if someone worships a lot but takes in the viruses of sins regularly, his worships would have no effect. But if he does not darken the mirror of his heart by committing sins, his divine nature would guide him to growth and perfection.

Accordingly, giving up sins is more important than worshiping. This is why Satan temps human beings to commit sins more than tempting them to give up sorship. Indeed, when sins dominate human being, his worships will not lead him towards God.

Thus, the most favorite thing is giving up two sins: the sin of stomach (eating illegitimate things) which is related to mamonism, accumulating wealth ang greed, and the sin related to sexual desire.